Here we are, one year out from my PBM surgery and while I’m not completely done with the reconstruction process I’m becoming more like me each day. Had I not run into so many complications along the way, I would have been done months and months ago but in the whole scheme of things, it’s only been one year of my life. I’m back to working out and moving forward. It’s been quite a bumpy road to get to this point but I still have absolutely no regrets about my decision.  For me, eliminating that 87% chance of developing breast cancer, and the quality of life that I’m enjoying with peace of mind has been the right choice for me.

For some women, surveillance is the right choice and I respect that. For me, however, I know that I’m a “what if” type of person and I would never have forgiven myself for gambling and losing. Also, the stress of the mammograms and MRIs would make me insane. Granted, it hasn’t been easy, especially from a physical standpoint, and just because I have no regrets about my choice doesn’t mean that I didn’t shed many tears over the past year and a half. I was devastated when I learned of my BRCA+ status and went through all of the stages of grief during that process. (My siblings and children have still not been tested yet, so while it’s not something I think about daily in terms of my own health at this point, it will certainly be brought to the forefront again when they are going through it. My biggest prayer is that my children and two brothers are all negative, then none of them will be placed in the situation to make the decisions that I had to.)

As I stand right now, I see my plastic surgeon again in June, then I will talk to him about 3D nipple tattooing. I have no desire to have protruding nipples as I am quite enjoying not having to wear a bra if I choose not to. My favorite undergarments these days are Daisy Fuentes Seamless Camisoles from Kohl’s. They have just the right amount of stretch and are very comfortable. I’ve also gained quite a bit of weight during my 6 surgeries in 14 month stretch so right now, priority number one in my life is to get back in shape. Summer will be here before I know it and unlike last summer when I had one expander and one flat side and needed to stuff, I can actually wear a bathing suit this year. But.. there is no way I’m doing it at this weight!  It’s time to really live my best life!